I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
