He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
