Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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