I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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