Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
