after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
