It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
