thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
