Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
