We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
