I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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