There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
