My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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