Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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