Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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