So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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