Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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