after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
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