the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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