Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize