Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
