Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
