we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
