Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
