i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
