just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
