but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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