Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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