Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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