Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
