the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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