If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
