Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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