...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
