I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
