Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
