yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
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