he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
