so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
