I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
