We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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