you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Randomize
