I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I AM VODKA MAN
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
