the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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