Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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