You smell like stripper and shame
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
