I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Is Oprah even human
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
