i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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