You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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