I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Don't tell me you're on acid again
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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